Part of my fascination with South Africa is the wild and the open plains and untouched nature like in the Wild West. It’s not harnessed by civilization, and you can still picture scenes from history or taken out of a Wilbur Smith book unfold before you on the fields. You can easily imagine what the first Europeans met when they came here 2-3 centuries ago. Although modern infrastructure is developing and laws are put in place, the cowboys and outlaws are still there.

The Wild West had train, diligence and bank robbers like Wild Bill Hickock and Billy the Kid to name a couple. South Africa has got cash transport robberies, hi-jackings and Bank/ATM heists… but too many tsotsies and hi-jackers for anybody to get their glorious name to stand out in the history books. Not one name? Does that mean that law and order prevails? Is The Scorpions really SO much better than the Pinkertons were in the Wild West?

The Winchester was just as crucial for protection against rogues as for hunting in the Wild West. More people than animals get killed by weapons here in South Africa. In the Wild West you could quickly dictate the law, or even become the law of your own little town. A bit of charisma, tons of greed, no scruples and hardy criminal friends was the recipe. Seems we got one name after all! Jacob Zuma must have seen a western or two, and gone bigger! He’s got the law… or at least the judges in his pockets (Hlope), mafia/underground connections (Sheiks), comrades singing “give me my machine gun” and brainwashed puppets (Malema) who publicly promise to “give their lives and kill for Zuma if he is tried” (corruption). Oh well, that might not be necessary… Since the Scorpions have become bothersome, Zuma is busy taking the sting out of the Scorpion. You can only salute him for improving a perfect recipe. He has really brought the Wild West to South Africa!

Wild Bill Hickock was shot dead during a game of poker holding two pairs, aces and eights, later called “dead man’s hand”! I wonder what cards Jacob Zuma holds? It can seem like he’s got the nuts, that he’s the chipmonk… eh… chip leader and only a bad beat (bullet, assegai or knobkerrie) can take him out of the game! Unlike Wild Bill, Zuma has got a squad to cover his back. Whilst the Wild West was a temporary step in the progress of civilization, it is hard to find that parallel here. The Wild West stayed put and are now stronger than ever! Zuma is bigger than Wild Bill Hickock, Billy the Kid and the rest together, and a much bigger harm to South African society! Zuma’s South Africa beats the raw Wild West on every account!

Image Credit: Photoshoptalent